Cleaning up Pee

I was wiping up pee off of the floor where Rebekah had had an accident and Alex said,

"How can you touch that pee with your hands!?"

M: "Well, I just have to wash them really well when I am done."

A: "Gross! I am never touching pee with my hands!"

M: "Well, you may have to when you are a daddy."

A: "Well, maybe my wife can just do that. I will just go to work all day (pause) every day."

Toy Land

Today, while I was talking on the phone to a lender about our options for home purchasing, Alex decided it would be fun to dump every single toy we own out all over the floor in our living room/playroom/family room. I gently reminded him, "Alex that is fine if you want to dump all those toys, but you know what that means for you right?"

A: "Oh. Well, you see this is called Toy Land. In Toy Land kids never clean up any toys. If they did, it wouldn't be Toy Land anymore."

M: "Hmmmmm......well, kids who live in Miller Land do clean up toys because if they don't then their parent's won't have any time to read them books at night because they will be so busy cleaning up toys in Toy Land."

A: "Oh. Well. I guess I can clean them up."

How to Get Rid of Monsters

We read a monster book tonight about how monsters are born under kids beds. Weird I know . . . on a side note . . . I often wonder how some of these kid's books ever got published in the first place?? Anyway, when I went to tuck A, age 4, into bed, he pulled the covers up to right beneath his little chin and said with fear in his eyes, "Mommy, what if a monster is born under my bed tonight?" To which I responded, "Well, then you can take your two fingers and just squish him up." Then this conversation ensued:

A: "But my fingers aren't big enough."

M: "Oh yeah. You're probably right."

A: "Are monsters real?"

M: "Nope."

A: "Then why did somebody make that monster book?"

M: "People like to make pretend things so we can use our imagination."

A: "Well, whenever I think of scary things, I always think of monsters and then I hide under my covers like this!"

M: "Well, let me tell you something about monsters.  Now, it's a secret, so are you sure you want to know?"

A: "Yes!"

M: "Well, there are very few things that monsters are scared of, but I can tell you the ones I know for sure."

A: "What!?"

M: "Monsters are very very very scared of Mommies!"

He then got really wide eyed and a huge smile on his face.

A: "Why? What do mommies do to monsters!?"

M: "Well, monsters are afraid of mommies because they know that if a mommy catches a monster then she will grab him and bake him in the oven and eat him right up for dinner."

A: "Whoah!! That would be disgusting!"

M: "Yep . . . that's why monsters don't ever come where a mommy lives. They do not like to be baked and eaten up."

A: "Who else are they afraid of?"

M: "Babysitters!"

A: "What do babysitters do to them?"

M: "Babysitters grab them quick and pop them in the microwave which makes the monsters explode!" 

A: "Really!? Wow! Are they afraid of anything else like dragons or super heroes?"

M: "They are only a little afraid of those things. BUT, there is ONE more thing they are very very very very afraid of!"

Again . . . realllllly wide eyed and excited!

A: "WHAT?! 

M: "Boys named Alex!"

A huge smile spreads across his no longer scared face....

A: "Why!?"

M: "Well, you don't know why?!"

A: "No. Why?"

M: "Well, it's because they know that boys named Alex are really really good at Karate and that if they come anywhere where a boy named Alex lives, that boy named Alex will karate chop him right up!"

Very very wide eyed now.....

A: "How do monsters know that?"

M: "Well . . . somehow they just know...."

A: "I think they know that because boys named Alex can kick harder than anybody and punch harder than anybody. That's how they know."

M: "hmmmmm . . . . ya know . . . I think you might be right. Good night Karate Boy."

Happy contented smile . . .

A: "Good night mommy."

Mommys Don't have Big Muscles

Today while I was on the ground doing push ups and working out, Alex looked over at me and said,

"Hey. Mommy's don't have big muscles."

M: "They don't huh?"

Later in the day . . . . we were walking out of the library and I was carrying Kaitlyn, our diaper bag, and a bag full of library books. Alex was carrying his bag, also fullllll of library books and said,

"Mommy . . . this . .. is . . . so  . . . heavy. Can you carry it?"

M: "Sure!"  PAUSE   "Soooo, mommy's don't have big muscles huh?"

A: "Well, they do have bigger muscles than Daddy. Annnnd, I guess they do have a little little little bit bigger muscles than me."

It Worked!

Today during sacrament meeting, Rebekah began taking off her panties right there in the pew!

We asked her to put them back on and she said loudly, "No I have to go poopoo!"

Joseph quickly took her to the potty and when they came back and were trying to quietly sit down in the pew, Rebekah YELLED out,

"Mommy I went peepee!!! IT WORKED!!!!"

Heavenly Father's House

I took Alex to the church last night (Saturday) for a free babysitting activity the Young Women were doing. He had been wearing his pajamas for quiet time cause they were comfy and before we left I asked him if he wanted to change. He didn't, so we left.

We got to the church and were about to go in the primary room where the activity was taking place and he stopped dead in his tracks, shut the door, and said, "Nope. I don't want to go in."

M: "Why?"

A: "I don't want them to see my pajamas."

M: "Oh Alex. It is just a fun activity. No one will even notice."

A: "No. I don't want them to see them!"

M: "Why are you so worried about them seeing your pajamas?"

A: "Well. This is Heavenly Father's house and it is a special place. I shouldn't be wearing these. I should be wearing nice clothes."

M: "Oh. Well, Alex I am so happy that you understand how very special Heavenly Father's house is, but can I tell you a secret?"

A: "Sure."

M: "Heavenly Father likes to let his children use his house for acvities during the week too. Not just on Sunday. On Sunday, that is His day, so he wants us to dress our best and be extra reverent. But, during the week he loves for us to come here in other modest clothes to be with our friends. On these days we can wear what we want to as long as it is modest."

A: "You mean we can wear what we want to?! Are you sure?"

M: "I am sure."

A: "Okay. I'll go in . . ."

Made in China

We attended the temple this week. Before we left I put on a dress I have that is the style where it criss crosses at the chest. I went into Alex's room to put him to bed and he looked at me and said, "You look so pretty Mommy!" I thanked him and he continued to stare at me. A bit later he said,

"Where did you get that dress?

M: "At the store a long time ago."

A: "Where did they get it?"

M: "They made it."

A: "I think they got it in China."

M: "Why do you think that?"

A: "Well look . . . it has to be from China because it looks like my karate uniform."

Then pointing at the criss cross part of the dress, he said

"See . . . it crosses over . . . just like karate uniforms. They are from China ya know."